Godly children; a second purpose for marriage. Last time, we introduced the first purpose of marriage, helpful companionship. Let’s take a look at what one author (Douglas Wilson) lists as the second of three biblical purposes for a Christian marriage. It would only make sense for an adoption forum to discuss the topic of children in a marriage. The very reason that many adopt is to fulfill this clear purpose.
“But did He not make them one,
Having a remnant of the Spirit?
And why one?
He seeks godly offspring.
Therefore take heed to your spirit,
And let none deal treacherously with the wife of his youth.” Malachi 2:15 (NIV)
In the last book of the Old Testament, we read what some Bible commentators consider the hardest verse in Malachi to translate. Malachi 2:15 has application to Abraham, Israel and marriage. And whether national unity or marital unity is in view, clearly, God is concerned about the unity of His people. And why was God concerned about the unity of His people, whether nations or marriages? Because “He seeks godly offspring.” Unity is required for godly offspring.
While you wait, consider how you will raise godly children. We must first realize that there is no such thing as godly offspring, godly children at birth. Whether biological or adopted, children are NOT godly at birth. So this second purpose of marriage, the raising of godly children, does not, I believe, have in view a distinction between adopted children or biological children. As a dad, I see the very same ungodly sin patterns in my two adopted children as we saw in our two biological children. Exactly the same!
Scripture clearly teaches that all are born with the same defect, the same inherited flaw of sin. Raising godly children then must first address the sin condition. When I met my youngest daughter in a Russian orphanage, I shared the gospel with her. Though it was in the only language I know (English) and in one she did not understand, I knew it was my job to preach the gospel to her from the earliest opportunity. I hope to lead her in the prayer of salvation as we daily bathe her in the truth of Scripture.
A great resource for your consideration is a book I recently read by Ray Comfort. It is called, “How to Bring Your Children to Christ & Keep Them There…avoiding the tragedy of false conversion.” I love the subtitle. I cannot imagine, short of losing a child, a parent’s greater fear than a child’s false conversion. This is a handy and well-written guide but I caution you that it hits hard on the disease of sin and expertly teaches how to use the Ten Commandments as a tool to expose the need for Grace, the need for a Savior.
God desires a godly offspring. All children, adopted or biological, left to their own designs will choose sin, defeat and destruction. It is only when godly parents, through the power of the Holy Spirit and the truth of the Bible, commit to confronting their children’s sin nature and teaching them diligently will godly offspring result.
Lastly, and as a reminder, the strength and unity of the marriage is key to raising godly offspring:
“The prophet Malachi states, as a means to that end, the importance of treating our wives with honor. If a man is treacherous to his wife, it will clearly have a negative effect on the children. Godly children are not said to give purpose to parenting, but rather they are a purpose of marriage.”—Douglas Wilson, Reforming Marriage.
Prayer: “Dear God, I know that You desire godly offspring. And it is only in first abiding as one in unity with You and abiding as one in unity in marriage can we see victory. Just as I was born in sin, so are all offspring. Show me how to lead my children to salvation. Teach me how to teach them the power and penalty of sin while pointing them to the promise of the Cross. You have ordained my marriage to be unified as one and to raise up a godly heritage. Teach me to love, lead and cherish my wife. May I find sufficiency in Your mighty Word and through the abiding presence of Your Holy Spirit. In Christ’s Name I pray, amen.”
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